live again

On 23rd june Monday : My hubby signed me up for a course to go rediscover myself. I was afraid cos i know that we have to really look at ourselves and be truthful during class to gain from this class. the teacher is a very smart man. he has eyes that see through your heart. he nails you down and gives you the the answer to your problems. I respect him but am afraid of him. i always know i dwell on negativity. lack motivation, lack determination unless it is something i like to do... but how to get it out from my system - stay positive? it wasnt it. this class started at 7pm but we ended at past mn. but i started to feel different after the class, thinking alot.

24th june tuesday : i looked forward to class but still carry a worried heart. the activities need interaction and i have always worried about group activities, i am afraid to fail. but through the day of learning, by the end of the day, i feel recharged. i felt enery. it was amazing. can't say much if what was done as it was a rule not to tell but my experience has never been so positive. i let my guard down and not worry about how people see us and oso not setting a barrier to bar people out. i see how small my problems are, in fact compared to others, they are really suffering and mines not even a speck cos their problem is so much bigger.

25th june wednesday : this is the day where i looked forward to class but am alittle sad that the class ends. listening to how people has fallen and stood up again, i am amazed. truly amazed and i dun doubt them, the truth is the truth and u can sense instantly how sincere these people are. during the self discovery time, i was very lucky to have the lecturer to help me cos i speak more fluently in english. i got an answer to my problem and i was able to see myself clearer. but when i heard what others said, i learnt from their experience and oso realised something very important to me... i need to really work on it... cos i totaly have forgotten that i do have another serious problem... i am so lucky to have met pats. my road is lighted up and i look forward to complete alot of tasks that has been waiting for me. these tasks were set by me, never took action but stayed inside me for so long... thus i have decided to blog less. cos i spent alot of time sitting here typing away. will record my life special events. i need time to go clear alot of things on hand. i hope to finish them before starting school and i really need to move it!