last day

wednesday . i lost track of dates... 30th i think. took a cab bac to school was there at 1+pm went to class and all the kids were spread out in class. My tcher got them to stand and she announced

'let all do what we planned...ready.... let give ms lc a hug..." i got shocked! are they all gog to rush over... but she continued... an "airhug". All 22 looked so cute... they stood up, stretch out the arms like gog to hug me but they stood where they were and keep moving the arms up and down calling my name to give me an AIR HUG! cos my tcher told them i was out bcos my tummy was not well. then suddenly someone said something that broke the sweet spell... :ARE U PREG MS LC!!! my big black figian... my little darling TIRI had to ask his favourite qns ... and i say no i am not and he say theres a baby inside right... its his last chance to ask me i was happy to be bac and see him care about me.

sat down and my class gave me a file filled with letters and poems. They autographed my year book and some of them are really funny. I got 2 gifts from 2 sweetest parents i have this year. they showered me gift throughout the year! Julian and Allie parents. body shop from Julian and Shanghai Tang from allie. Allie mum is the one who gave me godiva chocs for xmas and VD.my 1st shanghai tang... really smell nice. ginger flower candle... when the kids viewed the slideshow i made for them, tiri walked over and ask if he can sit next to me. I am happy that in the end he soften down and sitting next to me i felt sad to part somehow. Ms M read them the poem she wrote using their name and then they come to me to get the cd with the slideshow i did for them, report card and the printed poem. then came the time they were to go home... felt loss and jus follow them down. grace obviously was the saddest, she was to go back to america... she especially walk all the way bac to walk with me and gave me a hug half way... tiri joined in the hug.

the white choc is from dap she say its dam good... i am so lucky to have her as my fren!

i stood opposite my tcher, the children say the goodbyes and hug her then me and off they go to their buses. alot of them was afraid to hurt me but i gave them most of them a real hug but a longer one esp to hannah, michael, tiri, julian they were the "difficult" one i had at the beginning and grace. I was extremely sad when grace said her goodbyes... she was the best i had, very good in nature and in her work too. when the children were up on the bus, at the same time all the buses started to horn. there are a about 50 buses i think, mostly BIG so can u imagine the power of their horns! its amazing things they do in SAS. its their tradition on the last day of school they do the almost 5-10 mins horning! alot of tchers, aides, office staff, parents who came to fetch their kidos joined in. as the buses go we waved and the buses still horning. I pitied the people who stay in the terraces infront of our carpark! and the nearby hdb. it was super loud. but i enjoyed this way of saying goodbye, i find it fun and meaningful. a nice way. we cheered when the last bus left. then there was a wine and cheese farewell party in the library. i didnt go instead i went to catch up with tabby who didnt know i was gog to be in sch. popped by the library to say goodbye to my tcher. on sat she flying to india. she gog trekking there! she travels everytime theres a break!


left school went to meet dap to get my belt from her. met up with sis she got a coach wallet for my mum. then we went home for dinner. settled fotos with mum and she had trouble deciding what size... i took a foto of the 3r sample that we were given. scanner cannot use only can take with camera but blur and thats the biggest i can upload! i love my big family. 31 of us. sunday will be grandpa's bdae... i am so tired now. my bag was so heavy yesterday!!! now shoulders super achy!!! and i messed up my room with all my bags of goodies from school and now i gota clear it....xianz more aches...

connection disaster

monday blues? what a monday. Stayed over at mum's place on sunday but next morning mum's leg hurts and i sent her to the hopsital. long wait. crazy wait! hate the wait! i was dam hungry. my tcher mgs me and she wanted to talk to me regarding the slideshow. I msg her i call her bac at 3pm as we were about to go in to see doctor. thats where the connection went crazy! Mum had to do a mir on spine... on 6th june. suspected nerve been pressed and that caused her leg to go jelly and constant irritating pain. if yes, she need to go for an operation. i hope not.

to cheer her up i brought her to the new opened square2 to eat korean. i was dam hungry but waited for aunt kwai and vanessa who was on their way to join us. order 3 dishes even though the 2 of them not eating. The rice here is special at least i have never eaten like this in other korean places. its sweet as they really have pumkin, purple sweet potato,carrots and red dates pieces with the rice. mum liked it. i am glad i had time to eat with her, i am thankful. went into a korean supermarket and then while the adults went ot explore the ntuc at the top of the building i brot nesa to a korean ice-cream shop and we had grape flavour ice-cream cone. taste like grape bubblegum flavour. after lunch my left tummy was in pain. gerald was in novena sq as he had lunch with some frens there. got him to meet me so that he can bring me home. reach home at about 3.45pm! i freak out and quickly email my tcher as i promise to call her after sch! the file was to huge and wot go thru i send via all my emails and gmail went thru but bounced. she msg me at 4pm but when i called her at 4.15pm she didn't pick up and i freak out. luckily May was able to save me as she propose i send the cd to her bro shop and he can pass her and she can pass it to my tcher! i was SAVED! THANK YOU MAY!!!! we tabao dinner after passing the cd. kolo mee opened a stall in tpy. we tabao for his mum to try. after dinner came another shock, the agency called and say the hotel fully booked on the 9th and ask us to fly there on the 10th. gerald got mad as they called in the afternoon that everything is fine. she was mad kept asking us to fly 10th instead of looking for another hotel for us. bcos of tat my hp was all the time next to me in case my tcher call me but i kan jeong so i went into the room to search the net for alternatives and forget to take my hp along! and true enough she msg me to call her at 8pm. but guess what time i saw the msg! 10pm... yah wat a day!
the school sent me a basket of flowers with fruits. i am touched but i was in no mood to eat anything with so many stuff gog wrong. i was worried that my tcher would be mad at me. i was worried if may remember to pass it to her. i got up early today to check email on tcher's reply and reply from penang hotel. msg May and she got it to my tcher but my tcher didnt say much... but i thankful for her help. waitied and finally my tcher send my mgs saying the slideshow was great. i called her straight away and she invited me bac to class to bide farewell to the kids at our own class graduation at 1.30pm tommorrow. i am going. I just dun wanna cry thou. i am a crybaby. glad it went well... now waiting for the stupid agency to call. hopefully everything goes smoothly.

update from doctor

i stayed home most of the time... its eat, tv, medication, nap, tv, dinner, medication, sleep occasionally check emails and chat for awhile with friends. the only thing i won't miss is my 12pm sharp MARTHA STEWART! LOVE the show! i am crazy that they now show it and i dun know when they started but hopefully the continue showing her in june and july when i am having my summer break! now about the medication ... it is so hard to swallow! so many.... really getting SICK of eating med! went back to mum's for dinner on wed & fri and she avoided cooking seafood as they are "poisonous" for my wound, making it itch. and of cos my MIL, she took care of my lunch everyday before gog off to work. GX has been really nice, taking care of me.

Friday was dreadful till after i saw dr chew. gerald came home late and we hurried to catch the bus to the clinic. when we were at the register, met my collegue the one who intro me to this doctor, she brought her teen daughter for checkup. we waited for 45mins. hate it when i was suppose to be check as the last few times it HURTS!!! doc knows i am scared. but this time after the operation... its not as bad. the report came back stating the fibroid and blood clot is not cancerous. but one of my tube is blocked. i am suffering from endometriosis. I need to eat another 3 types of medicine... consider if i want to go for 4 jabs over 3 months, each costing $390... yes it will cost us $1200 ... op was about 6+k... before and after doc consultation usually with medicine cost us each time $200+++ - $300+++ ... the jab was to suppress my hormone and slowing down the fibroids and blood clot reoccuring too soon... there are roots and they will grow again... so it is good and bad news...

Well, he suggested that i should still stay at home to recover the "wounds" thou small they are wounds and i can't have BIG actions and with the medication i need to nap. so i decided not to risk infections or tear the wounds... next week i will have to coop in the house. Friday after doc went home to mums. She cooked the superb noodles and chicken chop! i was a happy gal. she decided to do the steam egg that i was craving for! loved that it was the best! better than HK! haha..really and its my recipe. self-amended! I stayed over as the next day was Letycia bdae and gx cannot attend as he had to work and wot be able to change shift its SAT, no one will change it with him. so i stayed over talked to mum and make her sleepless! haha... she usually sleep by 11 the most i drag it past 12m. but the next morning i regret as she regardless what time she slept she latest on weekend if not gog to the market she will start doing her housework at 8am!!! she was busy cleaning the room... it was crazy!!! i got off bed storm into kitchen and decided to make HK french toast... not very successful thou... no i will try again till it works!
(the twins and their penguin walk! they are so adorable!)
head off to pick the twins as my uncle and aunt is in shanghai. they are the cutest and i really consider them as very good babies! easy to tease and to take care. arrived at Shangrila for Letycia's 4th bdae... at The Line restaurant. the place is amazing...16 open concept counter with fresh food prepared infront of you! but as i am not fully recovered...dam i had to be teased by my own brother with the fresh oyster, the lemon scent killed me! sis who sat next to me had a whole platter of fresh SALMON sashimi... i took a slice as its fish but didnt dare try more than that ONE pc as it is raw scared not good for my recovery! I LOVE SALMON SASHIMI!!!! weeeeeep!!!! ... it was soooooo good. WHY! WHY! i found my lamb chops... it was goooood love it. the dessert counter was to die for loads of choice and mind what i say I DIDN"T FINISH EXPLORING IT! i shared most with my cousin Ben, but most of it was.... soso but there is ONE chocolate cake, that cake is a MUST! to diefor! WE ALL LOVED IT! the biggest piece in the left photo with green in between the thick chocolate mousse... tats THE one!


as usual i was more proactive and i can't help walking around even thou i shouldn't be. but i did sit when i needed it. so i helped to take photos and its a profession sickness .... when i see the kids messed up i use the "teacher way" to solve the problem by first making them stop and listen... haha like real right... ok lah at least i manage to take a group photo for my cousin and her classmates k. they are all so cute but haha very active!!! kids... OMG her cake was soooooo CUTE! she had this soft toy that she loved bot in US from Universal Studio? and when i was at disney hk i tot i can find not remembering its NOT from disney. I want the TOY! ok back to the cake... see for yourself... its custom-order...custom-made. how much i dun know. where i yet to find out. aunt surprised me and my cousin ann with a gift from kids 21. she got a purse and i got a make-up bag. its LONDON one.... must be ex...


she just want to thank us for helping her out to organise these few very "close" events for the family. we had photoshoot, then her daughter 4th bdae, next Sunday will be my grandpa's bdae celebration... dam sad there will be dishes i can't eat again! but dishes aside... it kinda sad... sort of knowing it mit be his last. happy birthday but contradiction?

(the bdae gal and her brother's top so cute and he's so handsome! and his "no.no,no" is so cool! haha only ben will know what exactly i am saying!)
post the few pics of myself to let you all see that i am fine! i am recovering and will be super active very soon! hopefully... mayb not if i decided to go for the jab... yes thats spidey! haha spoil my very few photos i took at today's party i post it up see if u dare to do it again next time! haha! shan't reveal the mystery spidey! he purposely ran to be behind us when he knew we were gog to take a group pic... i shan't waste his efforts for "spoiling" the photo! MUST SHARE! hee! there are alot of artworks along every path in this hotel. i like the photo i took with my mum. i look fine right... but i was like holding my tummy whenever i sit or stand... paranoid? i rather not risk hurting myself!

after the whole afternoon at Shangrila... went home fix the penang family trip info with gx... well his mum agreed gog so we wanted to book but reality is it is more expensive then stated... well yes we forget to check the actual price... cos they always base it on the cheapest hotel on their list... so we are still searching... hopefully to book by tommorow. I am now so tired. think today is the longest i have stand since operation. yes it stings me now... i need to rest, but 1st i need to get a HUGE cuppa water and eat med. AGAIN. i have to finish the course...

to all my friends who send me regards! : Thanks for all the care and concern! Special thanks to MR and MRS SOH! thank you so much for the chicken essence! its soooo sweet. didnt want to msg you but rather thank you on my blog must annouce! haha ... hope you guys dun mind! cos YOU GUYS ARE SO SWEET! its nice to know so many people care.... thanks everyone!

anxiety

my doc never told me i need to rest 2 weeks. Sort of troubled by his actions! Will the school fire me!!! i love my job at sas but now i gota risk it jus bcos he didnt tell me it will be that seriuos that i need 2 weeks rest. after the op i was already wandering how in the world am i going to work when i am in such pain.

Yesterday the nurse took out stitches! how come got stitches??? tot gx bot the $300 healing plaster then we found out its meant for inside the body! she asked Gx to leave but i ask for him as i know i will b in pain, i hate pain. She got him and he held me hand as she ask me to breathe deep in as she snipped the thread! and next deep breathe she pull the thread out! OUCH! sting me! she taught us how to clean the wound. there were little marks on me... one inside the belly button area... after that we waited and doc ask for me to be in a small room. He jus question me to find out how's my condition. didnt really specify my condition jus tell me generally the same thing that he told me over the phone on sat. when he told me 2 wks rest i was like WHAT!!! i know i need it but he didnt tell me all these esp i asked him pain? - no dun worry no painful. I specifically told him i can't take leave can i come bac June as its my hols he say urgent and no worries... I know he meant well for me but... i jus hope everyone can be understanding not that they are not but i feel bad and next week will be my children las week. and there are reports to be out.... jus hope that i will recover soon. There was no major consultation as friday we need to be bac for the reports. hopefully nothing cancerous... althou i know it has roots and grow again... he gave me 6 types of med and thats about 8 tablets some 2x some 3x a day...

we left the clinic, had lunch outside as i had alot of porridage and got pancakes then went home. ate my med and emailed office and my teacher. Gx vet the email and correct it for me as what i wrote was jus tots and not in sequence. went to nap and when i woke up i watched tv with his family. i fidget alot as each position still set off pain after sometime. dinner was at 10pm as all of had dumplings eariler on. Gx dad went to pray while i was napping and had bought dumplings to pray. i am feeling better as i think my wounds are healing but i cannot have BIG actions or climb stairs as that triggers pain. Gx cleaned my wounds and i took pics of the marks. my leg and some parts on my body had bruises which the doc say its ok....

the last pic is the bruise i got on my tummy. it has turn yellow-greenish from blueish.

Right now, my MIL is now cooking porridage and steaming fish for me. Later gog home to see mum who's oso recovering from muscle pain in the leg... hope all these will be over soon.

i am thankful

Gx has been taking care of me, giving me a hand to get up and when i wana sit or lie down. getting me water to eat med and oilment when the aching is terrible he massages the pain away.
I am lucky. He got bad scares when he saw me after the op as i seem to be in great pain.
My MIL is sweet. She takes care of me and always reminding me to rest. She has been steaming fish for me. Yesterday she saw me in pain as i lie on the sofa to rest, the right side of my body ache and pain was unbearable and she help me ease the pain by putting a tiger plaster on me. When i threw up, that worried her. I am so troublesome but she never complained. My mum boiled Black Chicken soup since morning but bcos i suffered pain in the afternoon, gx say its better for me to stay put at hm cos the car ride will cause me more pain. he went to pick up the soup after work and mum prepared few dishes and rice for our dinner. I am thankful.

family portrait

Saturday 19th
i started preparing myself since 1pm. I was slow as the wound on me won't allow me to do anything fast. dressed up, make up and waited for Gx to be home. I was in pain when he got back. I stood too long and prob when picking up stuff i exerted on my wounds. We couldn't reach home to fetch my family so we headed straight down. we arrived jus right after Uncle K and Aunt K famliy parked their car. As there are 31 one of us including my baby cousins, of cos there will be some kinda problems... with the pain i wonder if many mistaken me that i m angry. But i was not cos i was in pain more than anything. luckily my bro, sis and cousins are understanding. althou i had problem walking as i was slow and the pain will prike me i went in to see my grandpa do his individual foto. He doesnt like to take fotos. Got our little twin Nico to make him smile.
When it was our turn to do the family portrait we were all squash in heat, esp us younger gen were all standing on plastic stools. Y? cos we were all waiting for the little ones to sit right on the floor! it was crazy! cos luc started to cry. we had hard time getting him to stop. hopefully we can choose one that everyone was smiling, eyes opened and luc not crying and the rest of kidos sitting nicely. heard alot of complains... sometime i wished not to be in-charge so that others can take charge and experience my difficulty. But when i do it I have no regrets as its for my family. Since young my family is very important to me. I hope that it will maintain strong. I am proud to be in this big famly.

my grandpa's entourage. Whenever we go out, these boys carry him, help him out in every ways... and grandpa's very proud of them... i know he is...


After photoshoot, we head down to Jumbo seafood at riverside. I had to forego eating crabs and prawns that GX told me its not nice but he ate my share. I was in pain during the dinner and was worse in the car ride. Mum was worried for me as i will alone after my MIL leave for work and GX be back only at 5pm. She asked me to stay over but the tot of the stairs freaked me out.
My MIL went to the market early today jus to get fish for me... she is now preparing lunch for me. i am dam lucky. tommorrow gog back to see dr chew... not expecting good news. when will this be over?

my first operation

what a week. me sitting with pain cos jus had minor surgery yesterday.
I deduce that for one to be happy throughout the week Monday has to be the right start. Yes dun call it monday blues but happy monday or else the week wot be right.

monday : after school rushed off to go United Sq to get chocolate cake from Bakersinn. Cos bumped into 3 ex-collegues and got home late... but that ended well.

tuesday: my off day as i needed to get my teeth done. instead of 2hours my dentist had only 1hr to slot me in. after that went to look for clothes for photoshoot. instead at taka found a top i liked so i got it and found my dress at forever 21. met serena for lunch and she chose tingtaifong. She loves xiaolong bao! we chatted and took train together. she went off to work while i went bugis in search of a studio to take IC photo. rushed down to the very crowded Immigration building, but luckily for IC q, it was shorter. got my new IC and took cab to gynae @ gleneagles. Doc was certainly sure i got clots inside and urge us to sign up the surgery to check whats wrong. I know theres something wrong... so after discussion wih gx i was gog to do the op. felt sad and uneasy and worried since tues. watched spidey at cineleisure.

wednesday: cos i could't sleep well i woke up late and had to rushed to school. got Jojo to do my duty. the kidos are getting restless and again challenging me somehow. My kidos are fighting, arguing and denying. that was small matter to me compared to my mum leg. She was complaining about leg pain since sunday and got mc for 2 days but the pain got worse. she asked bro and sis to keep from me how seriuos her condition was tat morning. She teared cos when she tried to get down the stairs she was in great pain. at hospital different doctor told her different things and her conditions seems bad. that freak her out and her pain in her leg persist till she had difficulty lifting it up onto the wheelchair metal plate. thank goodness for her after all the test and physio checkup results was that she had a very bad muscle pull. got myself a classical cd with 100 songs @ $19.90 a gd price for 4 cds.

thursday: gerald went to book my surgery. he told me that doc prescribe me the same painkillers my mum had. that painkiller is very strong according to ann who knows about all these pills. She used to work as admin in hospital. that means pain... freak out. after school met dap at vivo cos was looking for LiTTLE MISS tees as on friday was character day- children will wear costumes or dress up like their favourite book character. those litttle miss tee cost $49.90! i got my dress from F21 @ $59.90... and they left little designs like Ms Wise... so no tees got a bite at superdog, ate korean bbq meat sticks at one of the little food stalls, everytime i walked vivo i hardly go into those big shops and always end up at page one. love it there. went home to see mum. i was in a frustrated mood.

friday: late again! this time woke up at 7am! super late and was lucky to grab a cab straight away! but that cost me a bomb to get to school. Library organised free starbucks breakfast. got a banana mufffin and coffee. as i can't eat after 12pm tat day, i ate tuna bread, almond snicker bar, 2 sushi handroll, a banana and drank apple juice. as for character day i wore gx's stitch tee. didn't wana wear my white as i was afraid to dirty mine and cos his was blue seem better. some of them dressed up as harry potter, witches, advernturers, cutest was this gal from another class she was in a penguin costume! after speaking to Khatijah at lunch, sort of know wat to expect fr the operation. she been thru it 3 times. so i was prepared that it mit reoccur. at gleneagles i was lead ti a room where the nurses changed me, jab on my butt, pushed me on the bed into the operation room. i felt weird lying on that bed wheeled around the place. all i can see was the ceiling and lights. Gx waited outside while nurses kept asking me for my details. was feeling very tired, kept closing my eyes. op started around 6.20pm. i was transferred onto the metal operation table with 3 pax lifting me up from the mattress i was sleeping on. looked at the big round light above me and felt strange, felt cold. i was put to sleep when they jab me the second time. when i woke up i felt pain. it was unbearable. they wheeled me out and i saw gx. they transfered me back onto my bed. tat hurt alot! i teared according to gx and i slept again. when i woke up it was less painfull but still i can't really move. they prepared cheese sandwich and milo for me. ate half and gx didnt have dinner so he finished up as he didn have appetitate to eat later. left hospital at about 12mn after settling my expensive medical bills, my in-laws came to fetch me. esp my MIL she was very worried about me. once home i went straight to bed.

sat morning: now i feel less pain but still i walked slowly and it does hurt alittle still. my MIL is very nice, she made me porridge and steam fish. called my doc to find out roughly hows my condition. doesn't seem fine and he say it has roots and will grow again althou he cleared all the blood clots and fibriods... and one of my tube is not good. SAD. jus ate med gog to rest now later got photoshoot. hopefully i dun look too pale. and i gota smile so that they wot be worried esp my mum. will see gynae on monday.
the top bandage is where my belly button is...

my mum his mum

mums' day on Sunday. sis decided its gog to be western. with many places fully booked I got seats @ buckaroo. so dinner was at 5pm. There were 7 of us. 4 clam clower soup in "bread bowl", 6 buffalo wings, 6 giantic fried mushroom, pork ribs, pan fried dory fish, 2 mushroom sauce steak, 4 huge pint hoegarden! 1 margaritta and 1 a&w rootbeer. Hows that? FULL LAH! stuffed!

after the meal, we drove to bottletree... filled with people cos muddy sis didn't wana get down and we werent there to eat so we drove out to sembawang park... FILLED... people everywhere bbq, camps everywhere. walked to jetty checked out the professional fishing rod... so long! there was a couple catching tiny crabs. We then left headed to end of yishun to seletar dam and bro lead the way from there through seletar camp and head back to Jalan Kayu. the drive was sort of smooth as there were no traffic lights but surprisingly many cars took the route. its our 1st time getting hm from yishun from thru this seletar camp. sis got nydc new york cheesecake. SINFULLY good. Mum asked if i staying cos gx was working midnite shift... and i said yes cos she asked and told me i got clothes in her wardrobe.


mum's leg hurt... kneecap problem. so today she didnt go to work. me dam tired today cos woke up early as i gota take bus to change train to work. not used to waking that early. after school went to novena to buy cake for Motherinlaw. She wanted chocolate cake and i wanted to get her a bakersinn cake. on the way met Ms Jo-ann my ex eton house collegue and her son. she opened a clay shop at x2 new novena mall. got some for my cousin's bdae. got a bag of korean walnut cake for my motherinlaw (MIL) but gota wait and then when i was walking i bumped into Ms Aishah and her daughter! we chatted and then suddenly saw Ms Georgie and her little gal and she said it was Hannah who spotted me from 2nd level. I was very touched when i gota know how her 3yr old remembered me! i was running late and still had to wait for the cake... they took quite awhile and gx called to hurry me... was upset with him as he was mad that i made everyone wait. i lost track of time but got frustrated as i didnt really mean it. his aunts joined us for dinner and the 3 sisters cut the cake together. Cake was not too bad chocolaty. only fotos of cake as gx wants his family photos private... so only can only drool over the cake! went to camp and me feeling sleepy now ... tomolo off cos gog dental and gynae... dun really look forward... feel lost and tired now. not gog to think handle it tomolo.

exhausted friday

it was pyjamas reading day! so every kido in 1st grade prob wear their pj straight from bed, hopped on bus and attend class! i brought my long pink pj pants (change in school) and topped with a normal pink top. I looked so pink! its pretty fun and easy day cos they read their books in a dark class, blankets, cushions and torch lights. they were calmer dun know if its the pj that give them the slow vibes. Well, had school provided breakfast for lunch. so when met dap i was hungry!!! as i had angmo breakfast and lunch i opt for Jap Teatime.

We went Sun, Moon for 2nd time but we liked the food we ordered this time better. 1st time when we were there was when it 1st opened. we had chocolate mochi with white bean paste in it with peanut soupy, tofu cheese cake was goood. the flavoured tea was sucky. got smell no taste. we ordered a set with 3 different types or sushi, a nice shredded salmon salad, and codfish potato balls, croquet? they were yums. its was good tea cum late lunch for me!

then she was kind enough to accompany me to check out studios... hate bargaining and hate the feeling they wanna "cheat" ... like gimme a high price for everything. and when i was telling what i needed for the family portrait... its a very sad feeling. my heart sunk esp when i talked about my grandpa's portrait. they know. they are professionals. ended very late. we started at 6+ till 9pm then go eat dinner.

We had yutaoluo, fish steamboat. we were tempted and we did ordered the shrimpaste chicken. i dabao the chicken and bought a salted-baked chicken for my in-laws. so round 2 for me at home, but the baked chicken was really good. after that i knocked out. had nightmare... so tired after the dream cos in it kept walking, chasing, running.... best i am awake now... prob gog bac to bed but i got prepare to go see grandpa... and tonite gota discussed when to take foto, which studio...

wednesday... wow!

today is a super duple busy day for me.

kidos from my class with 5 other classes have their performance today. right after lunch it was RUSH. rushed off to ngee ann for dental appointment. my teeth is not in good condition. receeding gum ... gota go back next week for round 2.

met gx, we walked to JL to meet mum but we stopped to check out LEI's garden restaurant cos i told him my collegue said its good. we made reservation. went to meet mum to check out the luggage bag at JL sale. its like 280 slash to 127 after member discount, 5 dollars off,, 5%off. Got lime green. it won over the orange one cos it was the last piece. almost got 2 but we stayed calm and think its better to jus own one for now. but where are we bringing it too? when? dunno... but still i loved it.

after we were all done we headed for dinner, i was starving cos i threw away my lunch... ate only half. the dinner was fantastic! every dishes were special. Mum liked it. my sis is our food tester (even for my wedding! i got her to give me her piece!) said we are gog to celebrate mum's bdae there! the highlight was the dessert. its was jus like HK's but... jus way too small bowl thou!

no pictures cos never bring camera... but i bet theres more to come, love the food its really good!
as for luggage, will post when get to travel... when? i dunno! hopefully soon! i wana win toto, cos i need alot of money to fly to spain & eastern europe! hopefully strike then June & July can fly... FATHOPE right? well... never know!

especially for my hubby

Chase from He's a woman, She's a man soundtrack.
Someday my prince will come from Jim Brickman The Disney Songbook

schedule for May ... need to move it!

Sunday 06 play mahkong with grandpa (tink he will sleep while we are deciding which tile...)

Mon 07 photostate IC and marriage cert for new ic & tuition
Tues 08 doctor lim...hypetatis jab & dinner @ mum's, go see grandpa
Wed 09 dental @ orchard ngee ann & movie? wild hog?
Thur 10 take picture for new ic. send the form out!
Fri 11 find the photo studio for family portrait
Sat 12 massage : present from dap & get a cake for mum's day!
Sun 13 Mothers' Day : bring mum out for lunch at Seletar camp

Mon 14 dinner with GX family : mum's day dinner
Tues 15 gynae @ gleneagles & dinner @ mums, see grandpa
Wed 16 movie
Thur 17 tuition resume
Fri 18 settel cpf @ bishan and back @ mum's
Sat 19 tuition then laundry day and dinner @ mums, see grandpa
Sun 20 photoshoot day, celebrate grandpa bdae?

Wed 23 buy Letycia present
Sat 26 Letycia 4th bdae
Sun 27 feel like seaside?

Tue 29 payday!
Wed 30 facial

ticking

as my ticker count down i should be happy... counting down to almost 2 mths holiday.
but i seem to be afraid, very, cos i dun know when but it seems a scary tot as i see 1 day less on the ticker.

today i experience the thickest skin someone can have. so feel like ticking her off.
uninvitied and simply rude in fact KPO. why is there such flies? eyes busy, mouth busy at making their heart black! -

thank goodness there is still people who are nice. i cannot be struck with flies...
lucky i survived. start the song : I WILL SURVIVE.
wheres my swat for FLIES?

voice

i can't imagine unable to hear myself speak, laugh, sing... even cry. voiceless...
my grandpa voice box is affected and is getting worse so fast ... too fast... handling the news, now the actual situation. i'm so afraid the spread... but its fast, very fast, its tough and its going to be worse for him.

he tried to clear his thoart badly today to ask us question or answer us. he tried to sit up as he tot lying down too long is affecting him... he's not stupid. my grandpa is smart, he knows and he is jus trying his best to speak, finding ways to make himself heard. its painful for us to see him but the pain he go through is worse cos its physically and mentally.

i didnt cry, but its so hard.

2sides

everything have sides... can be 2 or even more sides.

starting to kinda hate the situation .... many people are testing my patience.

attitude always caused becos the person is (tinking they are) on the upperhand...

is it neccessary? i may sound stern in tone cos theres no mood for anything right now.
life and death... why can't people jus behave? what happens when the power is taken away?

planned to take mum out for mothers' day lunch but seems like she and I wot be in the mood. Mum is sad when i get bullied, i know she feels for me, afraid that i can't take it right now cos there are so many things happening. pull through this friday in school, i need to settle cpf stuff, hate it and oso take passport foto... for new ic... hate taking such photos...always turns out ugly.
i jus need sleep ... right now

freeze

i am in a confuse stage. i should be crying, feeling sad. but i seem to be able to control it this time. i am feeling weird. i sort of freeze my real feelings and confuse myself. i think about grandpa but yet i sort of try to switch to what should i do for him now and not think about the pain. think is bcos we all talked and hear this alot that he's very old, lucky, strong, should be contented... he is lucky. only teared 3 times but am afraid when it comes... i dun know if i can hold it any longer... i am stressed. the only thing now is to make him happy.